This may be a bit annoying and twisted for you, but I do love her, but I need to really let her go, set her free. She needs to set herself free, so that she'd be in a better place, and make me happy like that. If she doesn't, I will forever be in this shitty mood that she has intended to give me. I don't know how I survived this long trying to put up with her crap. Worst off, I can't even believe that I came out from being this ridiculously stupid, annoying, rowdy, unsmart, stalker kid and now realizing how incredibly dumb and unlikable I was back then. I hope not to be that person ever again, if I'm ever around my mother again! It took me 12 years (throughout school) to get myself to be a normal, somewhat likable self again, and my mother is NOT going to screw up the real self of me now.
This post was pointless, but I had to say something to save myself from doing anything worse to anyone or myself.